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The federal government is launching a new pedestrian safety initiative that is apparently modeled on New York City DOT programs from the late '80s and early '90s. The Onion reports:

New_Get_R.jpgWASHINGTON-In an attempt to address rising pedestrian deaths, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration launched a new educational outreach program Monday to encourage people to "Get The Fuck Outta The Road."

The program began in selected cities this month with the distribution of pamphlets at each city's most dangerous intersections. It will also expand into national radio spots, televised PSAs, and, most importantly, word-of-mouth. Included in the pamphlets are tips on how every responsible pedestrian can learn to "Get The Fuck Outta The Road," including "Move your ass!" and "Look where you're fucking going for once!" as well as an instructive diagram for removing one's head from one's ass prior to stepping into the crosswalk.

NHTSA officials say they hope the program will eventually branch out to include elementary schools with the child-friendly program "Hey Kids, Get The Fuck Outta The Road!" which will feature a mascot called Tire-Tread Teddy.

Read on ...

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