Thursday’s Headlines: See You in the ER Edition

We spend a lot of time at Streetsblog using the term “crash,” not “accident” and raging about cyclists who are hit by cars.

So forgive this sentence: Our old man editor had a bike accident yesterday after he was hit by a cat.

Yes, a cat, not a car (as a cop later asked) or a cab (as Rita, the admitting nurse at the Brooklyn Hospital ER misheard). A cat.

It was on Vanderbilt Avenue in Brooklyn’s Fort Greene. Kuntzman was feeling fine, his side bag filled with grilled chicken and freshly baked bread (sorry, Mr. Mayor) for a secluded rendezvous in Queens.

Car traffic was moving like bats fleeing hell (which everyone has been noticing), and one speeding vehicle spooked a gray tabby, who raced toward our splendid splinter — who thought, “Certainly that cat’s going to veer off or stop, right?” only to discover that the fraidy cat wasn’t stopping. Or veering! The ensuing collision left the cat fine (according to two witnesses) and our hard-working hypochondriac with a severely separated shoulder (which some call acromioclavicular separation).

It also left him with a long list of people to thank: George, who pulled up in his Mercedes and pulled out a first aid kit to stop the bleeding — then later drove him to Brooklyn Hospital; Eli, who saw the whole thing from his door and supplied water, ice and a place to store a bike for a few days (Editor’s note: Eli, it might be a while...); and several other people who didn’t give their names but were polite enough to laugh at our ebullient editor’s gallows humor (reminder: writer Vince DiMiceli is in possession of Kuntzman’s pre-written obit ... for just these occasions).

He will also always be endeared to the woman who walked over with her dog, said she’d seen the whole thing, and declared, in a thick Brooklyn accent, “This is why I hate cats; ya nevuh know where dey gonna go!”

So that was yesterday. In other news (wait there was OTHER news?):

• In a story that won’t surprise fans of Streetsblog’s  speeding coverage, drag racing complaints to 311 have quadrupled since the COVID lockdown (Gothamist).
• Gothamist also followed Streetsblog’s story on NYPD precincts’ wholesale theft of streetspace, which mostly started during the protests. “Nearly three weeks after the after the start of protests against racist police violence, the NYPD is still blocking New Yorkers from accessing their public streets and sidewalks outside police stations,” Jake Offenhartz writes. The story exercised @2AvSagas, who asked (having long since given up on the mayor), “do we have a City Council?"

• MTA honchos Sarah Feinberg and Patrick Foye confidently predict that subway ridership will rebound. (AMNY).
• The mayor’s surface-transportation panel will recommend several demand-management measures in order to forestall the post-COVID carmegeddon, including HOV lanes and the removal of parking, NY1’s Dan Rivoli reports.
• Transit advocates are shifting their lobbying efforts toward the federal government, looking too buttonhole Sen. Schumer into corralling “Moscow Mitch” for more stimulus money (DailyNews).
• The Department of Transportation, the Economic Development Corporation, and Lyft will deliver bikes to NYC Health & Hospitals Coney Island on Thursday as part of their effort to provide bikes to essential workers during the COVID-19 crisis (NYCDOT release).
• A recidivist felon got arrested — again! — when he dragged an allegedly stolen motorcycle into the subway at 72nd Street (NY Post).
• Bronx Bust: Wild footage captured a driver going ape-shit in the northwest Bronx yesterday — striking pedestrians, a cyclist and parked cars in a spree that lightly injured seven (NY Post). The 43-year-old driver was taken into custody but no charges have been announced (Norwood News).