Tuesday’s Headlines: Where’s Bill Edition

I got into the business when Ed Koch was still mayor. Then I covered little bits of the Dinkins, Giuliani and Bloomberg administrations. All of those guys, in their own way, hated the press. But at least they took questions from reporters every single day. So I'm just going on notice that the next time Mayor de Blasio decides to hold a press avail — which isn't today, by the way — I'm coming with a full notepad and lots of memos I've been writing on cocktail napkins for at least a week. One of them says, "Dyckman." One of them says, "Morris Park Avenue." One of them says, "Queens Boulevard." Another says, "Marty Golden." And there's another I can't really read, but it may simply be a reminder not to forget my mother's birthday.

Here's the news:

• I have to say I was a bit confused by the headline on NPR's story about scooters, "As E-Scooters Roll Into American Cities, So Do Safety Concerns." You guys do understand that car drivers killed more than 37,000 people last year, right? Kinda puts the "scooter threat" in perspective a bit, dontcha think?
• The Bike Snob goes after the Spandex set in his latest column. (Outside)
• MTA announces a "haunted subway" for Halloween. What could go wrong? (Gothamist, amNY)
• OK, so maybe I was a bit harsh on Senator Chuck Schumer yesterday, calling him out for not doing enough to fight Donald Trump's right-wing assault on the judiciary, so today I want to thank our senior senator for his work on getting us some more legroom on airplanes.
• Mayor de Blasio confirms that he's going with the "Promen-nada!" plan for the BQE repairs. (Brooklyn Paper)
• Car2Go comes to Queens — and naturally residents are concerned about what they consider their parking spaces. (QNS)
• Some great car mayhem shots from the great Paul Martinka. (Brooklyn Paper)
• If you see lots of bus shelters blocked off this week, it's because one fell apart in Staten Island and JCDecaux is doing the "abundance of caution" thing. (Patch, amNY, WSJ)
• City DOT unveils a "left turn calming" program on Staten Island. Cue the locals who fail to react calmly to it (though Beep Jimmy Oddo likes it!). (Staten Island Advance)
• Some Williamsburgers are calling for the reopening of the old Hope Street underpass under the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway, which was closed in the 1990s because it was gross and everyone hated it. (Bklyner)
• And, finally, wait, what?! Um, we have to do better, New York. This is an embarrassment. (NY Times)