A Smugger Version of This Weekend’s Backstabbing in the Daily News

This weekend you might have come across the anonymous Daily News editorial in which Arthur Browne’s opinion team called Paul Steely White “smug” for defending bike-share (in an opinion piece solicited by Arthur Browne’s opinion team). But is it smug to point out that New Yorkers who don’t own cars also deserve to have a share of the curb? Or that bike-share stations made in 2013 belong in historic neighborhoods as much as 2013 model cars?

Of course not. For a dose of genuine smugness, I invite Arthur Browne and his team of cranks to read this condensed, satirical version of the attack they published on Saturday:

Moving one’s car for alternate-side parking is the single most aggravating aspect of living in New York City. Unless you’re one of those people who don’t own a car, in which case you never have to spend a second worrying about where to put your car, or whether you’ve paid up all your outstanding parking fines.

Not only do we despise alternate-side parking, we also despise every single New Yorker who doesn’t have to structure their life around it.

All of this has nothing to do with bike-share, which isn’t going to make owning a car in NYC any more or less miserable. But it fills us with rage to know that the city is making it easier to live without a car by launching this bike-share program, when New Yorkers without cars already have it so good.

Someone wipe that grin off Paul White’s face.

Now that’s smug.

  • KillMoto

    What makes me most sad about unthinking motorists is… If only they would think.

    When I ride my bike, they’re not stuck behind a car. And when I divest of my car, because options like public transit, car sharing, Citi Bike and better biking/walking infrastructure… Well, that’s one fewer car competing for the alternate side free parking.

    If only they would think.

    If I were car dependent, I’d be falling all over myself to get my neighbors out of cars. More parking and less traffic for me!

  • Alex Knight

    My favorite is when drivers blame cyclists for traffic and tell them to “Get a car!” Blows. My. Mind.

  • Anonymous

    What you are experiencing is Happy Wheel Rage. Driver’s stuck in traffic in polluting, fat-inducing boxes (Sad Wheels) are immediately enraged when they see you pedal by on your clean, healthy Happy Wheels.

  • J

    This NYDN piece is truly awful. The entire piece is based on putting words into White’s mouth that he didn’t say and then trashing those words. Where does he say that bikes are more equal than other forms of transport? Where does he say that cars are ugly? He doesn’t, yet the Daily News criticizes him for the opinions that they gave him. Sadly, this is what passes for editorial opinion these days.

  • Jesse

    I wish my bike had a car horn so I could lay on it every time I’m stuck behind a traffic jam of cars.

  • Anonymous

    It would be nice if streetsblog stopped linking to anti-bike clickbait. You’re just feeding the trolls.

  • Mark Walker

    Truly life-changing ideas and truly effective advocates prove their mettle by the quantity (high) and quality (low) of attacks on them. Ineffectual ones are unworthy of attack. So congrats to PSW and the folks who made Bikeshare happen.

  • Kate

    It’s absurd to think people don’t hoard parking spaces because of alternate- side-of-the-street parking, at least in my neighborhood where the cops turn a blind eye to the blocks-long double parking that occurs during those hours. The same cars are in the same spaces for months at a time. I park my car in a garage but can never even get an overnight spot on the street because of the ‘free’ street parking. I would be perfectly willing to pay to park on the street. I don’t feel that I am entitled to a space, and I am completely thrilled that bike share will be getting their share of the street.

  • kate

    I have to say, I once rode through a huge traffic jam (people waiting to get into the Lincoln Tunnel) and a woman yelled at me that I was insane. There I was, riding freely through towards the River, and she was completely stuck on a hot summer night. Who was the crazy one?

  • Eric McClure

    Yeah, I sometimes take perverse pleasure in reading the nonsense in the News and Post (yes, so I can feel smug, it’s true), but I hate giving them the clicks. Maybe Streetsblog could start copying and pasting the content rather than driving traffic that they wholly don’t deserve. Fair use for non-commercial purposes?

  • Joe R.

    I want to install a horn on my bike which is as loud and has the same sound as an Amtrak K5LA horn. Besides the stares I would get when I used it, I tend to think motorists would hear me. The only issue is the technical problems. The speaker would by necessity need to be huge.. The power source could be a few AAs since it would only be used intermittantly. If/when I find a viable solution, I’ll be glad to share my knowledge here.

  • Mark Walker

    Joe, please consider the effect your horn would have on pedestrians and other innocent bystanders including fellow cyclists. I already have horn-caused hearing damage (most of it caused during a single encounter with the driver of a pickup truck who was using an extra-loud horn). The primary effect of it is tinnitus. Mine is a loud high whine that I hear when I wake up, when I go to bed, and every moment in between. From now till the day I die, I will never hear silence again. Again, please give this some more thought. Thank you.

  • Joe R.

    Believe me, I wouldn’t be using such a loud horn in close proximity to pedestrians. I know how I feel when I’m walking and a car horn blasts a few feet away. I’m not subjecting anyone else to that. My sole purpose in using such a horn is to jar any drivers inside sound-proofed metal boxes out of their stupor.

  • Mark Walker

    Thank you Joe. You are a good egg. Please forgive me for becoming alarmed, but there’s a lot more to this story that I haven’t told and none of it’s cheerful. I’ll save it for a more appropriate time.

  • Driver

    I would think hoarding parking spaces should be considered a good thing. These must be people who own a car to use on occasion rather than to drive for every single errand or trip.

  • Ian Turner

    Adding extra noise to the environment is not a socially productive thing to do.

  • Joe, you might be interested in the Air Zound bicycle horn. At 115 decibels, it is plenty loud. You can get one at most bike shops or through Amazon.

  • Driver

    Neither is getting run over by an inattentive or inept driver.

  • david

    Not even worth reading that daily news editorial but I did enjoy all the bikini photos, I guess they consider themselves serious journalists.

  • Andrew

    Please don’t use that horn within a three-block radius of any buildings that might have people inside them near the windows. Thanks.

  • People absolutely hoard. In my block, there is a man who owns a scooter solely to save a spot in front of his house. I have never seen him ride the scooter. He just wheels it into the spot when he leaves. “His” spot is next to a hydrant, so no one can park the scooter in. It’s quite brilliant, actually.

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